Best-Kept Secrets

Johnny-on-the-Spot … by John Foster …

Today’s news seems to always mention a “whistle-blower”.

“Whistleblowing” is a term for someone who “speaks out about a person or entity that is, or has been, doing something wrong.”

The formal definition is “the activity of a person, often an employee, revealing information about activity within a private or public organization that is deemed illegal, immoral, illicit unsafe or fraudulent”.

Many credit Ralph Nader with coining the phrase in the early 1970’s although origins of the word date back to the 19th century with law enforcement connections.

“Whistle-blowing” started being used by journalists in the 1960’s for people who revealed wrong-doing.

Famous whistle-blowers you ,ay recall include Erin Brockovich who challenged Pacific Gas and Electric on a Hinckley, California pollution issue.

Julia Roberts starred as Erin in the movie that came out in 2000 and garnered several awards.

There was W. Mark Felt, the infamous “Deep Throat” who spilled information on the Watergate cover-up.

Edward Snowden spoke up about alleged governmental global surveillance programs while Daniel Ellsberg spilled the beans on the Pentagon papers.

Don’t forget Karen Silkwood who raised concerns about the Kerr-McGee nuclear power plant in Oklahoma in 1972 and then died two years later in a “mysterious” car accident.

It can be sometimes “risky” blowing those whistles.

But I need to do some “whistleblowing” myself over some things I’ve observed in my lifetime.

First of all, the mirror shortage.

Go to any major retailer today and you’ll see people in public who obviously dressed without the benefit of having a mirror.

I dress better to mow the lawn or work on home improvement projects.

I need to blow the whistle on navigating four-way stops.

Most drivers either forgot or nodded off during Driver’s Education when that was covered.

When did auto manufacturers install “ESP turn signals” in cars?

It sure helps when you’re driving if a motorist uses those mechanical devices on the steering column to clue other drivers as to where they’re going.

I guess if they know, these “ESP” devices are supposed to let us know.

Free range shopping carts.

Shopping carts were not meant to be left in an empty parking space so the wind can blow them it parked vehicles.

Those “cart corrals” do not have giant magnets in them to draw carts to them.

America, take the few extra steps required and push those shopping carts into the corral or take them to the front of the store at least.

Please!

In those few public restrooms that still use paper towels, it appears we need to practice our free throws.

I’m amazed at how many people can’t hit the waste container.

And, when we do, the trash can resembles the “Mt. Everest” of paper towels.

Am I the only non-employee who tromps down the towels in the can with my foot, or, heaven forbid! push those down with my hand before I wash my own?

(I know. I just grossed a few of you out with that admission.)

Paper trash cans are being replaced by those electric hurricanes than blow the water off our hands, provided we even washed them in the first place.

By the way, just because you’re proud of those new “ear buds” you own doesn’t mean I want to hear your half of a phone conversation while I’m eating in the restaurant.

To me, that borders on a violation of rules of etiquette or common sense.

Obviously, common sense isn’t so common anymore.

On the matter of etiquette, I understand some think it’s sexist for a man to hold a door open for a woman.

Oh well!

I shall continue to be a flaming sexist.

My parents taught me differently.

I’m all for exercise and walking but no one seems to remember that old childhood adage, “Single file, Indian style” and be on the left side of the roadway.

We have several neighborhood walkers who don bright yellow and orange vests and even flashing lights when they hoof it.

A nice touch but at least don’t walk after dark wearing all black.

Finally on the subject of “whistle-blowing”, what do Otis Redding, Paul Simon, the J. Geils Band, The Bangles, Bobby McFerrin and The Lovin’ Spoonful all have in common?

Musical hits with whistling included.

But my all timer favorite might be the 1952 offering of Roy Rogers and Dale Evans on “Happy Trails”.

Remember, Lauren Bacall said, “You know how to whistle, don’t you Steve? You just put your lips together and blow.”

It’s 1944 movie “double entendre” at its’ best!